Nicaragua Here We Come

 “Sometimes only the step I’m on, or the very next one ahead, is all that is illuminated for me.  God gives just the amount of light I need for the exact moment I need it.  At those times I walk in surrender to faith, unable to see the future and not fully comprehending the past.  And because it is God who has given me what light I have, I know I must reject the fear and doubt that threaten to overtake me.  I must determine to be content where I am, and allow God to get me where I need to go.  I walk forward, one step at a time, fully trusting that the light God sheds is absolutely sufficient.”  Just Enough Light for the Step I’m On, Trusting God in the Tough Times by Stormie OMartian

In December of 2000 a dear Christian lady gave me this book as I embarked upon my first semester at Cedarville University.  Over the past 12 years I have picked up this book several times and passed it on to many friends.  This past year I found the words and truths from scripture to once again touch my heart and life as I experienced many changes including: getting married, moving away from friends and family, leaving a job and several activities I enjoyed, living in a city on the east coast, finding a new church, and taking on a very challenging job.  The funny thing is I was just starting to get settled here in Pennsylvania and it is once again time to pack our things and leave the familiar to spend 3 months in Nicaragua.  We have no idea at this point where God will take us come December or January.  For a person who loves to plan, be in control and pour deeply into relationships all these changes and uncertainties have been very difficult. 

Now please don’t think I’m complaining, despite the many hardships due to transition, our first year of marriage has been filled with wonderful times and great adventures.  What Anthony and I have and continue to experience is life.  Everyone goes through seasons of change that test their faith and character.  The past year has indeed been that very thing, but the changes and challenges are teaching me many things about life, God and myself. 

As I look back over the last year God’s faithfulness is abundantly evident.  I could literally write a page at least about the small and big ways God has provided and the wonderful blessings.  These are the things however I tend to forget at the very time it’s most important to remember them.  This past winter and spring I studied the book of Ruth with my women’s Bible study at Grace Chapel.  The women and the Bible study were a very real example of the truth I learned from Ruth, that God is always working even when we don’t see it.  It is unclear to me what God is doing exactly in Anthony and I’s life.  All we know is that we are following the light He has given us for the next step. Nicaragua is that next step.  Despite fear and uncertainty I choose to believe the truth that God’s hand is at work and He will guide and direct us, even if it's only a step at a time. 

Thanks for reading my very first blog.  To be honest, it is with reservation that I write one.  I’m not one to “publicly” express some of my thoughts and feelings for others to read nor am I confident in my writing skills.  Nevertheless, I think writing and reflecting on challenges, new experiences and more than likely funny culture differences will be good for me.  Hope you enjoy it!